How much money should I gift the couple getting married?

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I can’t tell you how often we’re asked ‘how much money should we gift the couple getting married?’ It’s like the million dollar question, right? (Pun intended) So, here’s your answer……

In my professional opinion and pretty on point with wedding guest etiquette, you want to cover your wedding experience. Meaning you want to give enough money that covers your food and drinks at the wedding reception. On average, I would say this approximately is $100 per adult person. Now, if you’re attending a 20 person reception at a small banquet facility in the suburbs, it might be costing the couple a little less. If you’re a guest at a 300 person black tie wedding at the Four Seasons in Chicago, well, this is probably costing more then $100 per person. If you’re ever not sure you can always call the venue, say you’re attending a wedding there and ask what the cost per person is of an average wedding there. The venue representative isn’t going to pull up the couples contract and disclose personal cost and information. But, they will give you an average price per person quote.

Now, with that said. Maybe you’re in the wedding and your tuxedo was $200. Or maybe your sister is getting married so you not only spent $150 already for the bachelorette party but your bridesmaids dress was $400, oh, and you’re in college. And then,  maybe you’ve just lost your job or have three kids at home with another one on the way. Etiquette wise, yes, you’d want to ideally gift enough to cover your dinner and drinks. 2018, real life etiquette says……everyone stems from a different financial situation. GIVE WHAT YOU CAN. There are no rules with consequences. The couple didn’t invite you for your money, at least they shouldn’t have. The couple invited you because they want you to be there to celebrate this happy, amazing, special day with them. So don’t stress. If you can cover your plate, great. If you can’t, give what ever you can. Don’t be embarrassed, don’t be ashamed, just be real and true to yourself. No one wants you to go bankrupt to attend a wedding. And the couple should not have gone bankrupt planning their wedding.

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